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Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Graduation is approaching quickly.

Finally starting to look forward to graduation, I am finished with classes in about three weeks, then it's just a wait for the official Diploma. For the longest time I was not really looking forward to it. I was looking forward to getting my B.A., however, I was not looking forward to not having a schedule of classes. I was looking at a Graduate program, and had applied, but I never got to the portfolio. I was flip-flopping. I had a moment of realization though. When I started taking classes for my B.A. It was in September 2009. About a week after the Fall quarter ended in December 2009, my dad passed away. For most all of my time at SCAD I was still going through this process of grieving. I didn't take a break, I threw myself into working, I did talk to a counselor which did help, but talking about everything can only help so much. I was completely scattered instead of removing commitments, I was adding more commitments. 
I think mom's hospitalization in January this year was the tip of the iceberg. However, I proved to myself that I could live on my own, I could manage the house, although not gracefully.
Okay, back to my realization. While graduating is great, I think I have it intertwined with my grieving. I think that I have it figured that if I am still taking classes, I have this life raft. It's something to keep my head above water. Graduation means removing that life raft and seeing if I will float or sink. It's time to really look for work. I feel I have a strong faith. I try to "Let go, and Let God", which is sometimes hit and miss. I have not put enough trust in him, although he has proved to me time and time again that he is in control. So while it's quite easy for me to start worrying about what I am going to do after I finish my B.A. I know it will work itself out.

My Graduation from St. Petersburg College for my A.A./A.S.

Honestly, I am looking forward to Graduating now though I am not attending Graduation. I am quite fine with not sitting for in a ceremony for a few hours, and far too many important people would not be able to attend.



 

2 comments:

  1. Congrats Dreama! You've had a rough time but made it through despite hard times. I'm proud of you and look forward to your successful future :)

    ~ Elizabeth

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  2. I'm sorry life has been so rough for you while attending scad, you are a beautiful woman and I hope your future after graduation is wonderful and full of good opportunities.

    I can't wait to graduate but only because it means I can take on 2 fulltime jobs 1 for bills and 1 for saving toward moving and a downpayment for a house. I'm also not going to attend my graduation whenever that finally happens, I don't really feel the need to get a cap and gown and sit with mostly people I've never seen or talked to before.

    Please keep in touch Dreama I've been so lucky to have you to talk to and I am grateful for your presence in my life. :)

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